Here's one for you:
8.5 "Hey! Where's that @#$%ing goofball with the goatee?"
--Crazy Horse to Sitting Bull, 1877
"They said off with who's @#$%ing head?!?!?!?!"
Louis XVI of France, 1793
JOKE of the DAY
- oipunkguy
- Master Contributor
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Re: JOKE of the DAY
Cheers,
Aaron
Facebook.com/aarons.guitars
"Politicians are like diapers; they need to be changed often and for the same reason."
— Mark Twain
Aaron
Facebook.com/aarons.guitars
"Politicians are like diapers; they need to be changed often and for the same reason."
— Mark Twain
- Dennisthe Menace
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- Joined: Mon May 05, 2008 8:40 pm
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Re: JOKE of the DAY
How Dinosaurs Became Extinct
...............or..............
"The Very First Senior Moment"
http://www.google.com/imgres?imgurl=htt ... s%3Disch:1
...............or..............
"The Very First Senior Moment"
http://www.google.com/imgres?imgurl=htt ... s%3Disch:1
make the Mos' of it, choose the 'rite stuff.
.........Owner of 9 Mosrites...
.....proud owner and documented:
1963 "the Ventures" Model s/n #0038
http://www.thevintagerockproject.com/
.........Owner of 9 Mosrites...
.....proud owner and documented:
1963 "the Ventures" Model s/n #0038
http://www.thevintagerockproject.com/
- oipunkguy
- Master Contributor
- Posts: 2208
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- Location: Winchester, Virginia
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Re: JOKE of the DAY
awww the image didnt come up dennis
Cheers,
Aaron
Facebook.com/aarons.guitars
"Politicians are like diapers; they need to be changed often and for the same reason."
— Mark Twain
Aaron
Facebook.com/aarons.guitars
"Politicians are like diapers; they need to be changed often and for the same reason."
— Mark Twain
- Dennisthe Menace
- Moderator
- Posts: 4981
- Joined: Mon May 05, 2008 8:40 pm
- Location: Ft Lauderdale Florida
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Re: JOKE of the DAY
the BACON TREE
Two Illegal Mexicans are stuck in the desert after crossing into the United States, wandering aimlessly and starving.
They are about to just lie down and wait for death, when all of a sudden Luis says.........
"Hey Pepe, do you smell what I smell? Ees bacon, I theenk."
"Si, Luis, eet sure smells like bacon. "
With renewed hope they struggle up the next sand dune, & there, in the distance, is a tree loaded with bacon.
There's raw bacon, there's fried bacon, back bacon, double smoked bacon ... every imaginable kind of cured pork.
"Pepe, Pepe, we ees saved. Ees a bacon tree."
"Luis, maybe ees a meerage? We ees in the desert don't forget."
"Pepe, since when deed you ever hear of a meerage that smell like bacon...ees no meerage, ees a bacon tree."
And with that, Luis staggers towards the tree. He gets to within 5 metres, Pepe crawling close behind, when suddenly
a machine gun opens up, and Luis drops like a wet sock. Mortally wounded, he warns Pepe with his dying breath,
"Pepe... go back man, you was right, ees not a bacon tree!"
"Luis, Luis mi amigo... what ees it?"
"Pepe.. ees not a bacon tree. Ees. . .
Ees. . .
Ees. . .
Ees. . .
Ees a ham bush...."
SO SORRY, I know there is something wrong with me for sending this. I just could not help it!
The voices made me do it !!! And I bet you tried to do the accent didn't you - I know you did!
Two Illegal Mexicans are stuck in the desert after crossing into the United States, wandering aimlessly and starving.
They are about to just lie down and wait for death, when all of a sudden Luis says.........
"Hey Pepe, do you smell what I smell? Ees bacon, I theenk."
"Si, Luis, eet sure smells like bacon. "
With renewed hope they struggle up the next sand dune, & there, in the distance, is a tree loaded with bacon.
There's raw bacon, there's fried bacon, back bacon, double smoked bacon ... every imaginable kind of cured pork.
"Pepe, Pepe, we ees saved. Ees a bacon tree."
"Luis, maybe ees a meerage? We ees in the desert don't forget."
"Pepe, since when deed you ever hear of a meerage that smell like bacon...ees no meerage, ees a bacon tree."
And with that, Luis staggers towards the tree. He gets to within 5 metres, Pepe crawling close behind, when suddenly
a machine gun opens up, and Luis drops like a wet sock. Mortally wounded, he warns Pepe with his dying breath,
"Pepe... go back man, you was right, ees not a bacon tree!"
"Luis, Luis mi amigo... what ees it?"
"Pepe.. ees not a bacon tree. Ees. . .
Ees. . .
Ees. . .
Ees. . .
Ees a ham bush...."
SO SORRY, I know there is something wrong with me for sending this. I just could not help it!
The voices made me do it !!! And I bet you tried to do the accent didn't you - I know you did!
make the Mos' of it, choose the 'rite stuff.
.........Owner of 9 Mosrites...
.....proud owner and documented:
1963 "the Ventures" Model s/n #0038
http://www.thevintagerockproject.com/
.........Owner of 9 Mosrites...
.....proud owner and documented:
1963 "the Ventures" Model s/n #0038
http://www.thevintagerockproject.com/
- Sarah93003
- Master Contributor
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Re: JOKE of the DAY
yo mama brought up wrong, dats what it iz! (my best Arkansas accent. I am totally bi-lingual. I speak English and Suthin')
____________________
1965 Mosrite Celebrity Prototype with Vibramute
1972 Mosrite Celebrity-III
1977 Gibson MK-53
1982 Fender Bullet
1994 Gretsch Streamliner G3155 Custom
2005 Gibson Les Paul Standard Plus
2006 Jude Les Paul 12 String
1965 Mosrite Celebrity Prototype with Vibramute
1972 Mosrite Celebrity-III
1977 Gibson MK-53
1982 Fender Bullet
1994 Gretsch Streamliner G3155 Custom
2005 Gibson Les Paul Standard Plus
2006 Jude Les Paul 12 String
- Dennisthe Menace
- Moderator
- Posts: 4981
- Joined: Mon May 05, 2008 8:40 pm
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Re: JOKE of the DAY
(LOL!) She brought me up 'rite, because I play both kinds of music!!....Rock.....and Roll!!!Sarah93003 wrote:yo mama brought up wrong, dats what it iz! (my best Arkansas accent. I am totally bi-lingual. I speak English and Suthin')
make the Mos' of it, choose the 'rite stuff.
.........Owner of 9 Mosrites...
.....proud owner and documented:
1963 "the Ventures" Model s/n #0038
http://www.thevintagerockproject.com/
.........Owner of 9 Mosrites...
.....proud owner and documented:
1963 "the Ventures" Model s/n #0038
http://www.thevintagerockproject.com/
- oipunkguy
- Master Contributor
- Posts: 2208
- Joined: Tue Jul 22, 2008 1:05 am
- Location: Winchester, Virginia
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Re: JOKE of the DAY
are you sure your not from Arizona Dennis?
still, it was a funny story
still, it was a funny story
Cheers,
Aaron
Facebook.com/aarons.guitars
"Politicians are like diapers; they need to be changed often and for the same reason."
— Mark Twain
Aaron
Facebook.com/aarons.guitars
"Politicians are like diapers; they need to be changed often and for the same reason."
— Mark Twain
- oipunkguy
- Master Contributor
- Posts: 2208
- Joined: Tue Jul 22, 2008 1:05 am
- Location: Winchester, Virginia
- Contact:
Re: JOKE of the DAY
"Is it true that cannibals don't eat clowns because they taste funny?" -George Carlin
Cheers,
Aaron
Facebook.com/aarons.guitars
"Politicians are like diapers; they need to be changed often and for the same reason."
— Mark Twain
Aaron
Facebook.com/aarons.guitars
"Politicians are like diapers; they need to be changed often and for the same reason."
— Mark Twain
- Dennisthe Menace
- Moderator
- Posts: 4981
- Joined: Mon May 05, 2008 8:40 pm
- Location: Ft Lauderdale Florida
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Re: JOKE of the DAY
A 'FLORIDA' BLESSING
Bless this house, oh Lord, we cry.
Please keep A/C working, in mid-July.
Bless the walls, where termites dine,
while ants and roaches, march in time.
Bless our yard, where spiders pass,
and fire ant castles, in the grass.
Bless the garage, a home to please,
carpenter beetles, ticks and fleas.
Bless the love bugs, two by two,
the gnats and mosquitoes, that feed on you.
Millions of creatures, that fly or crawl,
in Florida , Lord, you've put them all!!
But this is home, and here we must stay,
So thank you Dear Lord, for insect spray.
Bless this house, oh Lord, we cry.
Please keep A/C working, in mid-July.
Bless the walls, where termites dine,
while ants and roaches, march in time.
Bless our yard, where spiders pass,
and fire ant castles, in the grass.
Bless the garage, a home to please,
carpenter beetles, ticks and fleas.
Bless the love bugs, two by two,
the gnats and mosquitoes, that feed on you.
Millions of creatures, that fly or crawl,
in Florida , Lord, you've put them all!!
But this is home, and here we must stay,
So thank you Dear Lord, for insect spray.
make the Mos' of it, choose the 'rite stuff.
.........Owner of 9 Mosrites...
.....proud owner and documented:
1963 "the Ventures" Model s/n #0038
http://www.thevintagerockproject.com/
.........Owner of 9 Mosrites...
.....proud owner and documented:
1963 "the Ventures" Model s/n #0038
http://www.thevintagerockproject.com/
- Dennisthe Menace
- Moderator
- Posts: 4981
- Joined: Mon May 05, 2008 8:40 pm
- Location: Ft Lauderdale Florida
- Contact:
Re: JOKE of the DAY
make the Mos' of it, choose the 'rite stuff.
.........Owner of 9 Mosrites...
.....proud owner and documented:
1963 "the Ventures" Model s/n #0038
http://www.thevintagerockproject.com/
.........Owner of 9 Mosrites...
.....proud owner and documented:
1963 "the Ventures" Model s/n #0038
http://www.thevintagerockproject.com/
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